Jane Pendry

DSFH, HPD; Reg CNHC, AfSFH, MNCH, ABNLP, ABH, IARTT, BA Hons (London), PGCE (Cantab). Trained & Accredited. Adults, children, 12 +. International

Are you a social media addict?

Are you spending just a bit too much time tweeting, posting or chatting online.

How much time are you spending on social media?

Take a guess at how much time you spend scrolling, liking, commenting, retweeting, sending photos and looking at cute videos of animals doing daft things.

Now calculate the percentage that isn’t actually purposeful: mindless scrolling, commenting on issues you don’t care about, or can’t seriously influence, following Harry or Megan (!), and engaging in discussion threads that are going nowhere.

Distractions and temptations

Studying can have its moments of enjoyment but it requires sustained attention and focus. It requires planning; discipline; and a lot of repetition.

You are looking at the same content over and over again. If it’s a subject you love, that’s okay. If it’s a subject you don’t like so much, the temptation to do something else… anything else… is huge.

You think. I’ll just check my Instagram account. I’ll just tweet what I’m doing. And then you find you just can’t stop.

Recent studies show that younger people can spend up to 9 hours on their phones. That’s a big chunk out of the day. And a serious amount of lost study time.

So what can you do about your social media habit?

Evasive action

You could delete all your social media accounts during the run up to exams! Seems drastic. If social media is embedded in your life, and the way you connect with friends or family, that isn’t an option.

Solutions

There’s no rocket science in these thoughts, but I hope they give you a starting point.

1. It sounds so obvious, but switch off your phone for planned study periods.

2. Turn off all notifications while you are studying and shortly before.

3. Put your phone on Do Not Disturb when planning to study.

4. Add social media into your study schedule. Make specific times to check your phone.

5. Study somewhere where you can structure your time: at home at the kitchen table, or in the local school library; or in your room, in a park, at a friend’s. Aim to choose somewhere you either can’t use your phone, or where you can leave your phone outside your study space.

6. Notify friends that you will turn your phone on at a given time, and let them know the time when you will turn it off again.

7. Agree with your friends when you will all be on social media, and when you will turn it off. If you agree together, it will be much easier for all of you. When your closest friends are not on social media, it’s frankly less interesting or engaging to be on it yourself.

8. Set aside a lunchtime slot, or an evening slot for social media. You can set your phone to accept calls from close family and friends in case of an emergency.

9. If you are the sort of person who once you start, can’t stop, only turn your phone on in the evening.

10. Create a ritual around social media time – a drink, a coffee, a snack. Make it relaxing, engaging and a deliberate planned activity.

11. Avoid controversial sites or people. Mute tweets, or block individuals, as soon as you see something you don’t like to avoid the temptation to give a piece of your mind to a particularly obnoxious individual. You won’t change their mind!

12. Recognise that social media can become obsessive. It has no obvious stop point so you have to create one. Set an alarm to tell you when its time to turn it off.

13. If you are at home with your parents or guardians while you are studying, give them permission to take your phone away for periods! One thing is for sure, they will certainly agree!

14. If you get absorbed by controversial stories, go ‘cold turkey’. Click on show less on Facebook feeds. Unfollow all relevant ‘body language’ sites, commentator and gossip sites. I’m short, kick Harry and Meghan into the long grass - metaphorically speaking. Take. Deep breath and do this activity all in one go. If you can agree with friends to do this, it will make it so much easier!

Social Media and Anxiety

As a Solution Focused Hypnotherapist, I see many young people who suffer from anxiety. Much of it caused by social media.

It’s not just the the naturally obsessive nature of it, but also because of cyberbullying, or distressing communications.

People are often stressed by the very nature of social media. Why hasn’t my friend replied? I must just check my social media? Does no-one like me? And the constant ping, ping, ping of information coming at them from all angles is agitating and sometimes overwhelming. Then there’s our old friend FOMO - fear of missing out.

Your Mind Cannot Multi-task

This is the big neuroscience take away.

Your mind cannot multi-task. No-one can multi-task. Not even your mum. It’s a myth!

Your agile, quick mind may be able to skip from one thing to another quickly, but the brain can only actually process one thing at a time. By trying to study and follow your social media, you are decreasing the effectiveness of your study time.

Do one thing at a time. And do it well.

So you have to make a decision that social media, and indeed your phone, are not going to dominate your life, determine your happiness or unhappiness, or interfere with your plans and ambitions.

Young minds are plastic minds

Remember, young minds are hugely plastic and developing connections all the time. So the habits you set down now, will be harder to break as time goes by.

If you are having serious issues with your phone and social media, and you feel they are contributing to your mental ill-health, seek professional advice, or a trained and accredited hypnotherapist or CBT specialist (both are effective but it’s a question of preference) and get support.

Our brains are wired for anxiety

Your brains are wired, like a hunter gatherer, for anxiety and vigilance, Choose to be the master of your phone! Don’t let your phone be your master.

You can choose to fritter away valuable study time gossiping about nothing, following the antics of the Kardashians, or arguing about something that won’t matter in ten years time; or you can focus on your studies, know you gave your exams your very best shot, and be proud of your achievements for the rest of your life.

You can choose whether to stop scrolling and start studying today.

Seek Professional Support

A considerable percentage of my clients are teenagers and young adults and I know that easing anxiety is not always as easy as a walk in the park!

If you are suffering from anxiety, during the exam season or in general, Solution Focused Therapies can help. By calming your central nervous system, toning your vagus nerve, and helping you you find your own solutions through Solution Focused conversations, you can to take control of your habits and behaviours.

Gentle, natural hypnotherapy

Using gentle guided meditations and suggestion-based hypnosis (no commands), I can help you rehearse and embed your new solutions until they become natural habits.

The results, with young plastic minds, can be dramatic and transformational with significant change often happening over a matter of a few short weeks of weekly sessions. At any age, however, unless we have a degenerative condition that affects the brain, our mind remains plastic and able to break old habits and create new ones. It may just take a little longer!

For a free telephone exploratory telephone consultation do get in touch.

If you suffer from a diagnosed mental health condition

NB: Hypnotherapy is a natural and organic process so outcomes vary from client to client. Sense-Ability Therapies are complementary therapies. If you are under the care of a psychiatrist or medical practitioner for mental health issues, please contact them to make sure hypnotherapy is suitable for you.

Jane Pendry
jane@sense-ability.co.uk
+44 (0) 7843 813 883
www.sense-ability.co.uk